brincando de fazer um quê com as palavras
Em quarto este – de dormir? Daqui de onde eu vou juntando um som com um quê muito gostoso de fazer – com as palavras. Uma ideia e depois outra e depois outra mais. Que vão elas, todas elas se misturando e rodopiando sons pra então sucintamente palavra, pedindo muito pra ser balbuciada com suficiência de sentidos mesmo que não. Pois-que palavras – refeitas no significado-agora que vou dando pra elas... Uma palavra. Em comprimido, assim mesmo. Mas que, saindo da condição esta, de dicionário, condiz é com sem-fim de outras – rotas. E é porque se multiplica, a tal palavra-rota, pondo na gente algum... humm... sentido.
O calculando dimensidades outras dessa palavra-caminhos-outros, eu proponho fazer ele pra segredar pra um alguém-quem. Em português hoje mesmo porque o texto tem um quê de palavrear com esse quem. Lições de língua nossa pra alguém que fala em linguagem outra. Mas antes um dito só dito, pois-que, mesmo ensinando, ele só suaviza opiniães minhas sobre ela – a tal palavra. Que é...? Senão, vejamos!
Maviosidade não combina com calmaria. Porque, no avesso disso, diz muito mais da experiência de a gente querer encontro com uma leveza que é ímpeto, ainda que pra poder dizer no vagar de um palavreado precisando de justeza-sentido. Então, o mavioso do dito não é por conta de expressão calma dele, mas porque antes disso desconjunta, impetuosa, uma vontade de ir buscar lá na pressa de um sentido-experiência pra dizer. Aí, sim, passada a experiência, a gente diz no calmo da leveza buscada nesta experiência que, refeita, palavreia o sentido-suavidade, vento-ventando desdobramentos. Digo então, redizendo, que esse alguém-quem que me escuta hoje a lição tem maviosidade no trato com a gente...
But how to say it again, without missing the essence of this amazing whirl towards language expression? First, this exercise claims to be followed by a sound reverberating dissonant images, but expressive on leading to metalanguage—a language beyond itself. Arnaldo Antunes' Quarto de dormir, Bedroom, for now the place from where I just sense, may be useful to let you understand the vertex and the germ of this work with language. And so this is once again for you, my voiceless word.
Portuguese has its complex interspaces. Which means you can play with the words by picking them up, taking them out of their dictionary condition, re-embossing their shape, adding up or obliterating this or that, and unbuilding their sense. In a word? You free up the words from their in-servitude condition when you do that. As if you sense them, even skin them, and then, by carving out their essence, you also free yourself from thinking of them under the so-called "dictionary condition". One-sided answers or meanings? Leave them all behind! The words carry so many bifurcations leading us to their inward motives—and motifs! Or just nowhere, so that hap is not a word that fits on this kind of exercise with words…agreed? It's impossible to perceive of them, the words, as if they pervaded such rigor or fixity. Quite the contrary. So indefinitely multiple, with plural routes, they are…Not a spark of that…fixatedness. Not rigidity, but precision…
Maviosidade and quietness do not match, if you are just wondering…
On the reverse side of serenity, maybe that's exactly where you will find out the deepest sense of this word—maviosidade. (And now I know, Audrey, how this significance parallels, so beautifully, your—mellifluence.)
It feels indeed eerily paradoxical; to say the least, because this word is usually considered to be translated into such tranquility…to do this or that. Well-well, poor visitors of the language(s)… Here you mind: where you think there is no hint, here it comes…a concept…hmm…that of Antithesis—Hegelian dialectics, yes?
Ha, you know, and far-beyond from what I only possibly dream of knowing, that not only social structures can be analyzed by this method of argument. Of argument…mind you! To free up the words from their stagnant condition—is it really possible? If maviosidade is "synthesized" as tranquility, does it exclude its "antithesis", exactly what helps you to understand its recurrence as a new "thesis"? A cycle. Imagine you… One pointing to another pointing to the same. (Complex swirls around the moon, I would just say nowadays, with eyes wide(r) open.) A method, it is, even in terms of word-lips, and so I’m sure that you’re already enjoying this exercise. Aren't you, at least?
Let me recapitulate: maviosidade should be comprehended from its antithesis. Hegel's dialectical method is worth considering as it truly help us to understand that. There's a path, in sum, for this word (maviosidade) to travel along until we can piece it together with delicacy. They do belong together. But not in one-sided way(s). The key concept revolves around such delicate motion. Correct. But it's only reasonable, and acceptable, if you are open to considering that this delicate motion evolves from impetuosity. From vehemence. From immediacy or urgency to say or do something. In a word: from such impulsive will to reach. (Nowadays, I clearly and so fearlessly can see this: you're the one I've been looking for…and trying so mellifluously to reach out…all these years, just understand that, all these three years, are you listening?)
Maviosidade echoes, then, experience. An intense one. (Tumtum, yumtum.) It’s not only a gesture in which you express gentleness or sweetness. There's a logic behind it. And far beyond that, it expresses the movement you are willing to let yourself into in order to reach this tranquility, or sweetness, on doing or saying something. By…being within.
A large part of this is that you only reach this delicate motion (the maviosidade yumtum, I append) if you desperately yearn for it. The word "desperately" tells you much about the antithesis I'm trying to clarify herein, yes? If you have to do (or say or feel, et al.) something, anything desperately, that means you must not lapse, you have to choose, to ponder, to be patient and figure out…myriad everythings. You have to plunge deeply into how you can make something appears to the others as…being delicate. These are, indeed, a delicate, patient motion toward something—that (beautifugly) smallness I have always found to be the most exquisite one, apropos. But, it also carries its antithesis, remember? Which is the tormented, frantic experience into how you might hunt for, puzzle out, and convert this turmoil inside into a delicate…for you, and for that other (part-of-you), the very other you love. (With droves upon droves of…maviosidade!)
And so this delicious word, maviosidade, chimes much better in with…intensity… Don't you see?